Do we acknowledge our fears? Do we carry them about as our own little “treasure?” Surrendering to God, in principle is straight forward. But I personally find that there are always new levels of surrender that are required. God is working on me one step at a time (I am probably too fearful or stubborn to deal with it any other way).
I have seen that I need to (and have in most areas) relinquished control. I in my Christian walk have put off most of the “old self” yet when it comes to my health, and to my livelihood I have tried to keep some of that control.
God provides us with wise and and loving counsel, both from His word, but also from His people. I, for one, will generally acknowledge the first, but often struggle with the second. I was given the word today to listen. “Listen to what?” was something I then had to ask in prayer. I was given Proverbs 15:28 ” The heart of the righteous weighs its answers.” What was I being told? Simply (okay, God is seldom too simple, but) rather than trying to work out alternatives when given counsel from those who care for me and “find my own way” (often based on the aforementioned fears), God is telling me to listen to counsel, seek His voice, pray to its application, then speak.
I all too often sought to justify my view without having first pondered (“weigh up”) what is being lovingly given to me. This is a point of shame.
God has provided for me so abundantly over the trials of the past five or six years. When I had a heart attack, I didn’t “fear” the response of people. I assumed in a worldly way that “of course they will understand I am poorly.” My turbulent life gives me overwhelming stress. I have discounted that stress. In so doing I have not shown respect to myself, or others who suffer stress or distress. Above all, in being dismissive of the reality of the impact of the stresses on my life, I have missed out on the peace God has to offer, as I have continued to “do it on my own strength.”
But why do we do this? The world is part of the answer. “Weakness” and “surrender” are not buzz words.
When I first shared these thoughts, Pastor Vince replied with encouragement via the word. He said, “Heb 13:5 Let your way of life be without the love of money, and be content with such things as you have, for He has said, “Not at all will I leave you, not at all will I forsake you, never!” Heb 13:6 so that we may boldly say, “The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do to me.”
As I surrender a little more each day. As I trust more and more. Let me hold on to this, and I encourage each of you to also, “If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31)”
Let go of fear. Let go of self. Listen, pray, then speak. Don’t answer, and then rely on self.
Padre (and a true spiritual rambling)